I was under the impression that our chances are better if he is still in the home.... I'm doing my best to act as if around him and using this board for my freak out moments. SO I am not freaking out in front of him.
KC this is the kind of thing that concerns me.
It shouldn't be: letting him stay give me a better chance of saving the MR
It should be: I refuse to share a home with a liar and a cheater.
The first one is a person that is scared. That doesn't have principles that govern their life. That are willing to let others treat them in ways they wouldn't want their kids or friends to be treated.
The second is a principled stand. It is standing up for what is right. It is showing the world that you are a person that is worthy of better. It is someone that is setting an example for those around them and for their kids of what should and should not be tolerated.
Understand that if you ask him to leave because he is cheating, he will try to gaslight you. He will try to make you feel crazy, that there is nothing going on. He will manipulate you into questioning your own knowledge and evidence. That's what lying cheaters do. Be ready for that.
I would tell him tonight that you want him out. (Realize that legally he likely doesn't have to leave.) And then be ready for the lies, manipulations, and gaslighting.
My guess? He'd be so shocked that you are standing up for yourself that he won't know how to act.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
