I do let my thoughts get the best of me sometimes. I think he will be happier with her. He will be better for her. He will play in the snow with her and her kids if she has any. He will turn off the tv and talk. He will stay up late to hang on every word she has to say. He will smile, work less, be involved, this is the hardest part of being dumped for OW. Thinking she’s his soul mate and I was just what? A placeholder?
People do not inherently change who they are. From YOUR perspective, you may think all those things about your H and his OW, but I promise you, while it may all be shiny and new now, that will wear off and the real person he is will show through at some point and he won't be much different than he was with you. People put their best foot forward in the beginning of a relationship, but one that was built on a shaky foundation is not going suddenly become stable. You have no idea if he thinks she is his soul mate and honestly, that isn't yours to deal with or worry about. Don't EVER think of yourself as a placeholder. You are a strong, vibrant, courageous woman. You, yourself, say you weren't happy and you can't go back to that. I get that you are the one pushing D and right now it is hard to see the forest for the trees, but start looking at yourself in a positive light. Don't think about what your H gained in the new relationship with OW because that is between then, but look at what he lost in letting you go.
Me 52, H53 Bomb drop 9/29/2014 Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014 Marriage #2 12/31/2019 5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships) 6 grandkids
