I still can't sleep... I'm exhausted and its 2hr here and there. I've a terrible headache.
I deliberately sit in the parking lot after off work and make phone calls. I decide to drive to store to pick things up. I dont want to be at home but I know the dogs need taken care of.
It's nearly 8pm... should be leaving for work soon so I head home.
Now he was not home until 12:30. Showered and talked to me... I went to work and he was texting me... so I k how he was up till 4pm.
I get home at 8pm and he is not up. Frack..
I go and tell him its nearly 8pm. He responds... with ok. I go about taking care of all the pets. So I'm not lifting a finger to help him at all.
He is constantly on his phone... he gets annoyed by something he is reading. But keeps reading. Not much eye contact. He asks about weather outside as we are expecting some nasty stuff .
I keep going about my business. I get on exercise equipment and I'm prob working out at 3x the rate I would due to all emotions in my head.
After 5min he leaves the house.. but then sits in driveway for 15mi before leaving. I know what he is doing g and with who.
Not even a simple thank you that I got him up.
He is more exhausted and sleep deprived than before BD.
Here we are at the point of no return. He made sure of that. I still dont know if we are S or D??? He seemed S today but now do I know for sure.... that man can sit there denying everything. Own your SH*TZ.
I left you feeling I lost interest... you got us to the point of no return.
I hate our convo today... the minute he said "T I have been on empty for a long time. I have been trying to tell you that" I should have just said - it must have been so hard and lonely thinking I didn't care for you any longer. Or some thing along that line... AND stopped. I just keep in arguing mode with what I said.
