I went back and read your very first thread that you posted. Your h has a history of having affairs, both PA and EA, throughout his marriage. Leopards do not change their spots, as one poster posted.
This is true. But he told me something today that makes what he said more believable that he hasn't yet... doesn't mean he won't. He goes out drinking and may make a bad decision if she is throwing herself at him. If he really is in an A the truth will eventually come out and he will have to live with the fact he lied to me.
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I think your h never truly warmed up to the idea of remaining in the relationship from several years ago. I think he's been biding his time and now that there is someone else in the picture, he's going to use her as an "exist affair" to leave the marriage. I honestly do not think that this man was very sincere in trying to make it work. He may have said and done some of the "right" things that he thought you wanted to hear, but his heart hasn't been in trying to work on the issues that may have come up in the second marriage.
Maybe... but honestly I feel he was very content with EVERYTHING as long as his need for physical affection was met. My H works LONG hours and many days without a break -- FOR US. He is sleep deprived and gets grumpy. I would take that personally and withdraw when I should have been saying its the stress and lack of sleep.
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Let him go, let God have him for a while. He knows you are desperate and in a panic over him leaving. In many ways, he may even get a thrill out of the fact that he may have two women fighting over him.
Yes... and maybe that explains something else he is doing??? I will write another post shortly about the rest of today.
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You do realize that all of that FB garbage was put out there so that you would see it. They are rubbing this stuff in your face to get to you and make you so angry that you'll put him and his belongings out on the street. Don't help him. If he wants to leave, he's going to have to be a man and do it on his own.
Most likely... he is probably all over the place and if he is staying with a female who is into him.. his ego is probably over the top and rubbing it in.
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Now about that puppy. If that puppy was purchased for him, then you need to consider several things...1) he needs to take the pup w/him because it is his; 2) if the puppy stays w/you, is your son going to be responsible for the pup's care; and 3) how do you propose to take care of a puppy when you were ungodly hours? Something has to give in this area because puppies require a lot of time and work. So, this is something you need to think about.
Yes, he is okay with taking the puppy when he goes but its unfair that he is doing NOTHING to help take care of puppy now. Puppy is doing okay but certainly I would feel better if he is walked and played with more. I'm attached to the puppy as is the other dog. I'm worried about sending off the puppy with H if he is not bonding with him now. I think having a dog will help him. BUT, I was very clear---- if you cannot handle the puppy then you must bring him back here. He agreed.
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As we all have stated...focus on YOU! Try detaching more and stop asking him questions or attempting to make small talk w/him. If he wants to talk to you, he will find you and talk. He's a roommate for the time being. He fired you as a wife, so leave him be. You are not his mother...allow him to figure things out for himself and please stop making excuses for his behavior. He's the one out there having the affair...not you.
I had a decent day overall. I talked with a good friend. Had a nice long drive on a pretty but cold day. Met up with family group at restaurant for a nice visit. They asked about H. I lied and said he was at work. Not the place to have that conversation!
