KC, Why do you continue to take on all of the blame? You aren't the one that is throwing in the towel here. Your self-esteem and self respect have been torn down and you need to find your way out of that rabbit hole of negativity. Sure, you've made mistakes, but my goodness, they are the past and you can't change the past. The present is a gift and one that you need to focus on right this very day. What can you do for yourself that will make the day a bit more pleasant for you? Find something to smile about even if it is just enjoying a good book. The future is not ours to predict and it will reveal itself when the time is right.
I am not the one throwing in the towel.
He went and got a puppy. That he hasn't been here to help out with. At the very least coordinate schedules to help get the puppy out and exercised.
He is not coming home repeatedly. I have not texted or called. He drove 2hr last night to take a shower here. Wouldn't make eye contact but was talking to me and asking questions. He volunteered that was working this weekend but didn't know if it was 8 or 12. Didn't know about Sunday.
I haven't once asked about his where abouts. So why tell me you are working? You could easily just be out partying all weekend. What would I know. Either way I cannot contact you at all.
You apparently come and go as you please.
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You trusted the system before...can you trust it again? Release him from your mind and allow the man upstairs to work on him. You need to focus on you and your son and please, please stop beating yourself up.
Its a struggle because every time I see him there is something different he wants to offer... sliding more to D.
I will admit he ultimately nice on Wednesday. It was nice that he was asking where I was. It was nice that I was telling him I needed to go and he kept trying to talk. We ended Wednesday on a nice note. The only conflict was when he said it was up to me what we do and I said S... do offer if you are not going to like my answer. Outside of that everything was fine.
He even agreed to deal with the fence people. Prior to that he wanted nothing to do with it.
I'm not dealing with the not coming home stuff - being unpredictable. He didn't sleep here yesterday and not today. Is that because he did not get sleep here on Wendesday??? THAT had nothing to do with me. The Atty phone call woke him up. He went back to bed - several times. I didn't bother him.
