My commute to DC was 1 hour and 30 minutes when the sun was shining and no accidents. If it was raining or snowing, the commute was almost double that one way. If he's driving that entire commute himself, yes, it can be stressful. If he's not driving it and has someone else doing the driving, he could catch naps on the way in and out. I, too, wouldn't trade my home and property to live closer.
If he's been doing the commute the entire marriage, why didn't a move take place earlier in the marriage? You don't have to answer my question unless you want to.
I still get the impression that you are making all kinds of excuses for his behavior when you need to be focusing and working on you. It's almost like you are trying to justify his wanting to leave. KC, you deserve better than all of this gaslighting he's doing. As for the "home" magazines sitting around, he's trying to get into your head and create more anxiety for you.
KC, we are trying to help you get to a better place, but you also need to help yourself a bit here. This isn't the first time around for you w/this man wanting to move and leave the marriage. Don't help him leave or figure out his finances. Worry about you and what you are going to do if he leaves. He's a grown man and the sooner he learns that the grass isn't greener over on the other side the better. He's the problem, not you.
KC, straighten that spine, hold your head up high and tell yourself every time he acting like a putz, that you are a good person and deserve better and you definitely deserve respect in all aspects of your life. Don't allow him to speak to you the way he does when he's angry, walk away from him, go to another room or just take a drive. You are not his punching bag. In order to get respect, you've got to respect yourself and set those boundaries.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
