Hi FS. My XH doesn’t do holidays with the kids, just OW, so I haven’t had to go through the family holidays without mom thing yet. But I have done the holidays without him, during our marriage too, so the kids and I have lots of shared activities and memories. I am actually glad he hasn’t done anything with them but feel like I am over it enough now that it won’t bother me too much when/if he finally does go on a holiday with them. Mostly I’ll be happy for them.
I think the decluttering is a good thing for you...although emotional, I’m sure. You are moving forward towards a new life...with him or without him. I, too, find it interesting he was unclear about whether or not you were divorcing. Honestly, I still have a gut feeling that the two of your aren’t done. Did you read on my thread about my run in with my old basketball coach? Married 36 years, divorced for five and now back together with this wife for two and a half. It does happen but I think you need to really let go before it does. Limbo is not a great place to be and you’ve been there quite awhile now. Oh...and his non-response to your texts that are about the mediation are interesting to me. He isn’t responding to you for a reason. It seems to me that after so long in limbo, if this was REALLY what he wanted, he would be actively giving you all of the information you need and being happy that you are finally taking some steps. But he’s not doing that... why?
Anyway...just wanted to lend you my support and let you know that I am still keeping up with your sitch even though I’ve moved over to Surviving the Big D forum. You and your family are in my thoughts.
