((((Pommy)))) Everything seems so much worse in the middle of the night, too. I haven’t been through this moment yet with my H, but I have absolutely hit that wall of disbelief, anger, sadness... again and again. It sounds like you’re DBing with grace despite all the hurt you’re feeling right now, totally understandably. And anger—what your H wanted to tell the children—wth? At least he realized how ridiculous and inappropriate that would be, I guess? Geez.
You’re right, don’t go in that spare room. Have faith that if H can get his act together and realize the wonderful woman and family he’s missing out on, he needs to go through this process and feel the loss. I know it hurts so much. Try reading some hopeful posts you have bookmarked. Listen to a calming podcast. Pray. Know that you are not alone, even though it’s dark right now. Just take it minute by minute. You can do this!
