Separated and facing divorce (Part 3)

[DonH]

I’m on your side here fireman I really am but, what are we supposed to believe from day to day - just based on your own words and writing.

February 15

So, last night I went out with someone who was a train wreck from one of the online sites. Within 10 minutes of meeting her, she was asking about how many others I was talking to and reiterating that "she will be second to no one". She then tried kissing me. 10 MINUTES. Good lord.

February 18

I'm not going on dates.

So which is it? What are we supposed to believe? And don’t think for a minute your teenagers and your W have not firgured this out and see your behavior. They are smarter than you think they are. At least teenagers are. They don’t miss much. Your actions are not matching your words.

I am all ears on ideas to win their trust back.

It takes time. They need to see a new pattern of behavior from you. Talk is cheap. Don’t even bother trying to tell them how you have changed - instead show them. And not for a few weeks or even a few months. It takes time - a lot if time. Eventually what you used to do, like going out with these train wreck OLD women, and them claiming you don’t date, that will become the old you, the you they remember from years ago. The current you will be putting them first and making good, sound decisions. They will eventually see it but you have to keep at it for months.