The answers to these are pretty straightforward from a DB perspective. Do YOU want to divide up finances or not? If no, then don't bring it up. If yes, then bring it up. With the DB approach you detach, make decisions for you, and take control of your life. Before you do anything dramatic, try to give yourself a few days to think about it, and consider posting here for feedback.
If he wants something, let him ask for it, and/or do the work, especially when that something is at odds with what you want for the future.
If you don't want separation, it's his problem to figure out the challenges. You just need to ensure you cover yourself. E.g., if he moves out, what will you do to ensure you get your $x/month in alimony the court would award you, and how are you going to make ends meet on that amount of alimony?
In all things, take away the HIM focus, and replace it with a healthier YOU focus.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
