Divorce because I betrayed her trust - PART 7

[DaB35]

Getting ready to go up again to collect a few more things this afternoon.

Two things that are still on my mind.

1. I have not made any contact with W's family or friends since last May. I've gone 100% dark and not spoken to any of them whatsoever. Is that correct? I do sometimes think (used to be all the time I'd think this) that they think I don't care enough about M or W or R, because I'm not 'fighting' by coming back, begging for forgiveness, etc. I still have not said anything to her parents, her siblings, etc.

I remember that W chastised me for not driving 300 miles to her sister's house to see her when it all started - "Why didn't you come here? Where's your passion?!" she'd angrily ask on the phone. Yet she'd previously asked for space, so I was giving it to her. This right-or-wrong-whatever-you-do situation is so frustrating.

2. When everything is done, do I offer closure of some sort to W? Do I tell her I'm sorry again? Do I give a succinct note saying things like "Sorry I felt I couldn't open up and be vulnerable to you" or "I was too ashamed to talk to anyone about my problems so that made it worse", or "I'm sorry I'd never let you know when I was upset or angry about something and suppress the emotion instead of talking about it" etc.

I intend to still be a lighthouse. Does that mean I just keep DBing without saying anything like that, and just be content in the knowledge that W will get to hear about my changes and possibly even see them?