1st Anniversary of Limbo, Indecisive WAH (part 2)

[Pommy99]

I feel like after a year of limbo, I can’t do this anymore. His feelings haven’t changed in a year and I don’t see how they will. He seems ever closer to leaving, but admits he doesn’t like change and upheaval. I desperately want to sit back and observe, be the lighthouse, but I don’t know if I’ve got that left in me.

Heck, what was I worried about saying not sure if I can do this! H has just told me straight up that he knows deep in his heart that he wants to S/D, that he doesn’t want to wake up every day feeling unhappy and guilty, that the only reason he is still here is because of me and the children, that he’s tried everything to invoke positive feelings (let’s get a dog/buy an investment property/go on holiday) but he keeps going back to feeling deeply unhappy and it’s the R that’s killing him. He is going to look at rentals tomorrow, something he booked earlier today before I got home.

I’ve crumbled in front of him and sobbed my heart out.

I guess my only move is to GAL, detach and plan life without him.