I legit had soo much on my calendar this week between work and life that I realized I misspoke. Actual valentines is rage room and mani pedi day.
It’s been weird couple of days so I haven’t been keeping up with my mess. H followed me around again last night wanted to talk about a friend making passive aggressive posts on social media. We had a long discussion about how I agree it’s inappropriate but we had a small tiff as to why. He was of the belief that our problems are our problems. I kindly informed him he put OUR friends in a position to pick sides. He wants to be out in public with OW most of his friends have removed me from social media so as not to out him like I don’t know or maybe it’s a protecting me thing whatever it maybe. But my friends can see everything he’s doing. I asked What did you think would happen? You put our “problems” on display, people make decisions. I said I asked you to be discreet for this exact reason. I said I’d talk to her because you are right it’s inappropriate but you need to get your head out of the sand and just because in this house we’ve come to find a peace recently literally no one else has and this effects more than us in these 4 walls. And you need to realize actions have a ripple effect. He said he hadn’t thought about things like that. He would appreciate if it would stop though. He shifted gears quickly and wanted to know what my plans with the girls were for valentines because he wanted to take them to dinner. Small talk the rest of the night.
IC went great. She’s so fantastic. And deals in the realm of reality. Old IC kept making boundary suggestions where the end point was me kicking him out and even though she knew my history with law and that I knew everyone’s rights including I don’t have the power to remove a person on the lease she wouldn’t back pedal. I brought that up when new IC asked why I left and she assured me that she’s not a lawyer but she specializes in couples so she know the legalities broadly and would never suggest things that are actually hollow threats. We talked about goals. Caught her up to speed. Everything about this just feels better.
Tonight H and I went to parent teacher conferences for D17. A few awkward silences in the car but other than that was super normal. He picked up desserts for all of us at the bake sale while I talked with another mom. Jokes, people watching, talking to D17 together when we got home. H was little cold and crabby compared to yesterday strangely. But since he’s been asleep in the recliner since 7:30pm I’m guessing it wasn’t me. His phone is buzzing away and he’s sleeping right through it. Makes me smile because let’s be real as above it all as I want to be I’m never going to fully shake that little bit of petty.
I’m super ready for this weekend and just a whole crap ton of me time.
