1st Anniversary of Limbo, Indecisive WAH (part 2)

[may22]

Re the holidays, unfortunately any trip would be abroad, so not just a case of booking accommodation, but would need flights as well. I would feel uneasy booking 3 flights and not 4. He has said about 5 times in the last few weeks “I want to go back to XXXX” (island we went to 3 years ago, and he knows it was my favourite holiday ever ). Is that a green light or a hint that he wants to go away? Would he say it if he had no desire to actually go with me? I don’t want to read anything into this but I am intrigued as to why he keeps saying it. He said it again when we were out on Saturday night....then the waiter came over and we never finished the conversation!

The weirdness about booking flights is the same reason I stayed here over Christmas break. For spring break, I talked about it with him before buying three tickets only-- and I do have the built-in excuse of the soccer tournament he was thinking about coaching, so it wasn't like I was purposefully leaving him out. Plus he only wants to fly one airline to get miles and that airline doesn't fly direct to where we're going, so that is another good excuse for him/us-- he is flying separately to get the miles and will meet us there if he wants. Anyway. I made it work this time and we'll see if he comes or not.

What if you looked into the place he has been mentioning (assuming you want to go there too), see if you can find good deals on flights and accommodations and then say (before you actually book the tickets) hey! I found a good deal to XXX, what do you think? Or I have three tickets on hold and am going to purchase for me and the kids, LMK if you want to come too. Another thing I did for awhile was send him emails with good flight deals in them (I'm signed up for a bunch because I love to travel) and back when things were good it was a way to spark conversations about places we wanted to go, and maybe we would pull the trigger and buy tix. I stopped doing that over the fall because he never responded and I decided it felt like pressure. But if you think your H wouldn't perceive it as pressure, maybe just send him a link that shows flights costing X (assuming they're a good deal) and letting him take it from there if he so chooses.

And again... it isn't the worst thing in the world to have a stay-cation. That can be fun too, exploring your own hometown and playing tourist, or still taking time off of work, staying home and playing board games and puzzles with the kids. Decide what it is YOU want to do and then plan from there.