Full throttle heaven - I like that. It is possibly more fitting than you realize. I’m considering expanding on that idea. However, this morning your post stirred a response within me.
Originally Posted by Gerda
The thing is that in Christianity there is a value judgement against evil. It isn't just an ebb and flow. It's an out and out armored battle. I don't want to appreciate any aspect of the divorce process or to observe it without judgement. It is evil and to me that is a fact. I don't want to allow it to become a subjective truth in my mind even if that is a form of peace. I just want to pray that God gives me that peace beyond understanding, if I lean on God, trust God, despite the evil around me.
What if that kind of subjective truth is the peace God wants for you? Is offering for you?
The business of divorce - yes fight for what you need and want to. There is much life ahead of you and your children. Financial security and protection is needed.
The other side of this - The accepting of H’s truth; The accepting, and altering, of your truth - Isn’t part of the business deal gone sideways.
In the out and out armoured battle, the armour is the light of God. Faith, compassion, forgiveness. Fighting begets fighting.
We aren’t here to judge others. God does that. We forgive our trespassers. That’s not becoming a doormat. You can still have boundaries, stand tall and strong, and hold your head up high.
The true victory in the fight against evil is forgiving it. Losing our fear, understanding our adversary, finding compassion for them, all leads to that forgiveness.
Do you remember my car getting hit on the highway? I was found 50% at fault. My friends at work are still upset about that, “how dare that guy get away with that”. Lol. I did lose the fight, and won the war. I forgave him long ago. He doesn’t have any mental or emotional real estate within me. XW is the same kind of thing - just a much much bigger story to be told.
H is not evil. He is deeply troubled and lost. What you’re fighting (outside of the business deal) is you.
What do imagine I would do if I met your H? How would I react to his screaming and yelling? His projecting upon the world?
Am I cloaked in my armour of light stating “I’m sorry you feel that way” ? Or am I more in his face?
I do empathize with your feelings regarding divorce and it’s process. It’s about control. What can you control? You cannot stop this. You can steer this process a bit, and ensure you get the best deal for you and your kids.
What can you control? You!
The inner you. That’s where your victory awaits.
What do you imagine yourself doing if you met my XW?
Are you happy with that? Proud of that imagined response from you? If not, change it.
Imagination is the first step in creation.
You want peace, despite the evil around you.
I want that for you as well.
And you know where I am.
Perhaps you and I are both walking a similar path.
Imagine that.
DnJ
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
