If she's not agreeable to transparency then she is not ready to reconcile... at least not all the way. My own WW made baby steps towards reconciling and we had a couple of false starts but things didn't really get rolling in earnest until she completely broke down, begged for forgiveness, and offered up all of her passwords, phone, etc.

Why would a spouse in a committed M have any reason to keep passwords and social media website access and the like from their spouse... or hide their phone?! No one should want or expect that kind of "privacy"... from their SPOUSE! Anyway, when a WW says this, she's not talking about privacy, she's talking about secrecy... which are two completely different things. She doesn't want privacy... what is she afraid of or what does she need protecting from that would require "privacy"?... What she wants is secrecy so she can carry on carrying on with OM behind her spouse's back without him knowing.

You'll know when she's ready... sounds like she's not.

Last edited by hoosjim; 02/03/20 04:18 PM.
H53/W51, R-ing 4/'18

"Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires"-Sg.of Sg 2:7

"So oftentimes it happens,that we live our lives in chains, & we never even know we have the key"-Eagles III 1:3