Gerda Finally Sees the Broken Fragments

[Rita]

Thanks, Grace, Job, Kml and DnJ, for all the viewpoints!

As usual having to leave details out is confusing this for you all and limiting your ability to advise.

If you know where I live, you can understand that taxes and fees are the size of the GDP of a small country and that the average local price per square foot times 700 is the same.

I didn't give H the details of how I calculated the amount. I just gave him the amount, but I hoped he had worked with someone to calculate what he would get if we actually sold everything so that he could see how much higher my offer was than what he would make selling it at an inflated price. I figured out what he would get if we sold the place at 30% above appraisal -- since I couldn't match that price, we would actually have to sell, and he would earn less than if he sold his share to me at appraisal minus debts with no taxes/fees. And, yes, DnJ, 14 percent more than my pie-in-the-sky 30% more is again the GDP of a small country. We do not live on the outskirts of a small rural town in Canada! The amount he wanted was 75% of the appraised value of the house. Our mortgage and other debts are literally half the appraised value of the house, so via a sale, he would get 25% of the appraised value, less all taxes, brokers fee, etc. And again, we are talking huge numbers here. I make very little salary and the sale would end the rental income, so I would never get approved for any mortgage after this. Without our rentals, I will have to work full-time and no more flexible schedule for my kids -- which means most likely my son will stop going to school entirely.

If I lose, I will of course make a new life and we will find happiness. But keeping my life as is is what is best for my kids, that is why I am trying to do this. And I finally qualifed for the refinance application, so I started that. I think H doesn't believe I will ever get the refi so it might help if I am ready to write him a check!

In the end, I asked my L about the risk of my motion failing. He said we would revert to the bad stip. If I win, all issues are back on table at trial. If I lose on some or all of my motion,probably at least child support would have to be heard at trial because that part was not in compliance with the law. I already have the bad stip and I did gain via my motion that he can't return to the house and that all the money I pay him each month is coming out of his ED. So I really have nothing to lose by waiting to see what the judge says. Even if I lose the motion entirely, then the trial will only be about his getting alimony and me covering his legal fees. He could not get either of those things, it is an MLC pipe dream. So the only thing I have to fear, I realized, is fear itself.

So I told my lawyer to sit tight, prepare our response to H's contempt of court motion (that is a whole other long and amazing story of how we are proving I am not in contempt but I had better not take the time nor say the details) and be ready to defend my motion. Then if I lose both, I just have to keep remembering not to have any pride about it but just to keep my eye on my goals and do what I can to reach them through this thick forest of MLC insanity and delusions. I mean, the MLCer can't even do MATH! The least subjective subject there is!!!!

DnJ, as usual your glass is most most full half full glass I ever encountered. Or mug of coffee with heavy cream. It's a good point that there was some negotiation but my dad pointed out that the number was so insane that it was obvious H wanted to NOT end this but just keep it going forever. I will I could tell you the numbers so you would understand but I had better not. But I will try to see it as an opening and not as a closing door.