We all have different parenting styles. I got a lot out of the parenting with love and logic class I attended and the book was a great read. If you read it, you can give it away when you are done. Even to your X. Do not worry about how she reacts.
One of the main ideas is that everyone "pulls their own wagon". Another is "Everything is a teachable experience".
You parent your way. Let the mother parent her way. You change the way you parent as you learn and grow. Focus on your relationship with your kids. Validate their experience. Reward the responsible behaviors. Let them experience natural consequences of poor choices so that the learn and grow from the experience.
I could wine to you for days on end about how my X is not parenting the same way I do. I can't control her. I am sure she complains about my parenting style.
None of us are perfect. Our parents weren't perfect. We all do the best with what we have. Some of us are lucky and realize this and can make positive changes to our beliefs and behaviors.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
