Stranger In My House Part 2

[HesAble]

OK! I highlighted all the ones you should just do now, and have a few notes as well. I crossed out everything having to do with him because... who the F cares about him? This is about YOU! I see no reason you can't start doing all of these things on the list, or at least trying. (except maybe the dog). What can you start doing on all of them?

-Get a dog! (I don't know if that is possible... I can't get one till my H is gone. But maybe you can. What is he going to do about it?)
-Move to a more desirable location w/ better schools (H picked our current home)
-Spend more time with my out-of-town family, allowing my kids to get to know them better
-Get more quality sleep. (H is a night owl who likes to sleep with lights and TV on all night)-- note, I know this is hard as I'm barely sleeping too. But... things that have helped me include going to bed earlier, 5HPT supplements, listening to guided sleep meditations, a glass of wine before bed)
-No longer will have to attend H's boring business events. He owns a small business. why do you have to go to these now?
-Can save some money and cut expenses. (H has often been financially irresponsible.)
-Less stress = better health overall
-Will have more time to spend time with old friends. (H disliked a few of my friends)
-Will have more time to bond and develop deeper relationships with my kids.
-More time to develop spiritually.
-Longer vacations and I get to pick the location! (H always wanted short vacations and we disagreed a lot on locations)
-More time to devote to community service.
-More time to devote to my career development.
-Less mess to clean up at home. (H is a slob).
-Complete freedom to walk around my home wearing whatever and looking however I want!
-If H had certain weekends w/kids, it would be the most he has ever spent time with them, freeing up some scheduled "me time" for me! Girls trip, anyone?! Spa weekend? Winery tour? Shopping trip? (All things H never wanted me to do)
-Can retire to wherever I want (well, within reason, of course).
-After kids leave home, can find work that allows me to travel extensively - a dream I have had.

May22, thanks so much for these notes and for reminding me that this is a list I can begin working on right away. I am doing some of these things already (e.g., more time with family, more time with kids, developing spiritually), but I could stand to put some effort into some of the other areas. Thanks for your encouragement! I am so grateful for the support I have found on this board. Some days you all are just the reassurance I need that I can get through this either way.