Swinging

[SecondChances]

I'm one of those ridiculously HD women. But even my fantasies stop at the tame end, ie threesomes. For me, fantasies fall into two categories, I call them A and B. The list is for things that I might actually do, the B list is mind candy that I figure will seriously damage me and possibly others if I ever acted on it.

I've decided that threesomes, any type of sharing is probably on the B list. I don't think I'm able to watch someone else do someone I love without it hurting a LOT. And I think I'd feel bad if someone who loved me could happily watch someone else do me.... I'd think something was wrong.

I do have a couple data points that helped me arrive at this conclusion. The women I know who tried the 3some thing, with the H they adored... eventually became extremely low drive, and the marriages ended. Things were never the same, and it was never discussed as a reason. I doubt the men have any idea how impactful it was. It's the kind of thing that if you don't get it, no one can explain to you-- but that doesn't make it less true.

Now a casual three-some? That could be hot. But I don't see it having a place in any sort of emotionally connected relationship, at least not for me. Essentially, it would lead me to think that I was the only one who was emotionally connected, and I would therefore immediately back up and create emotional distance. That's what I do when I care too much, it's a protective mechanism.