Newlywed and in crisis

[funbun]

I appreciate everyone's advice here in this forum, but I decided to go to the dinner...

Because of several things (1) The uncle was nice enough to invite me over even though he doesn't have to, it didn't feel appropriate to turn him down (2) Despite the sitch, we're married, W family is now my family too, there is a part of me that misses them and want to spend time with them (3) I didn't want W to see me as a man that rejects family time, I didn't want her to add that to the list of things that is 'wrong' with me.

Frankly, I'm glad I came. I had a nice time overall with W's family. They were warm towards me and were sympathetic to my sitch. They hoped that W and I would R again (of course, they didn't say that in front of W though, she would be angry if she knew). I was feeling down the whole week. Knowing there are people on her side that is supporting me gives me hope.

W didn't seemed to mind I was there. She understood that despite our sitch, we would still have to be present during family gatherings. Earlier during the separation she mentioned that she would still want to see my parents and she'd allow me to see her parents. We both do not want to jeopardize the relationships we have built with family members.

That evening I managed to keep my distance from W. Didn't interact with her other than "Hello" when I arrived and "I am going now" when I left. I reminded myself that I was only there to spend time with the Uncle and her family, not for her sake.

MIL also invited me to several other family gatherings next month: W's niece birthday, W's cousin wedding. I said I will try to come but no promises. I have a social obligation to attend these events but I know proper DB-ing means I shouldn't.

I want to DB properly, but I do not want to strain family relations, is there a balance to this? Or is this a mistake?