Am I getting closer, DnJ, to understanding how to hope?
Oh yes. You are doing wonderful.
Originally Posted by cardinal
Hopes do not have deadlines. Expectations have deadlines, because once I associate the likelihood of an event happening/not happening with a timeline, well, that places a deadline on it. So instead of focusing my thoughts on, for example, whether or not or when filing will or will not happen (look at all those references to time!), I should focus on a more general hope for reconciliation. Not: "I've made it through another day without papers, I hope it won't happen this week," (and, yes, fear drives much of that focus), but, simply, "I hope for reconciliation. I hope one day (not a day far or soon, but just one day) for reconciliation."
Is that what it looks like to change an expectation to a hope?
Yes. Very well done.
You make a good and valid point about the courts and their timelines. There are deadlines that need to be met, so time does drive some of our actions.
Originally Posted by cardinal
As if the law has a say in when my hope should become instead expectation or fantasy. Isn't that kind of arbitrary, when it comes to matters like love and faith and compassion and hope?
Definitely! That is a big reason to treat it like a business deal. Keep that separate from your hopes; it’s just business.
You also pointed out fear and how it drives the focus at times. Fear is another killer of hope.
I dug around and found my post about hope.
I figured one about fear may be helpful as well.
And while I was looking about I stumbled upon a neat little thing on sugar.
