Gerda Finally Sees the Broken Fragments

[Rita]

You nailed it.

Games.

H is using the legal system to his full advantage, like MLCers will. It’s a game of threats for them. Just another way to push your buttons. Leave him to your a##hole awesome lawyer.

I have been having a really harrowing time of it. But I guess I won the last round. Judge basically blackmailed me into giving H more money per month -- she said she would strike my request for relief from my motion if I didn't give him the money, and she would leave it if I did. I refused to do it unless it counted as ED because they were trying to say it was spousal support!!!!, and we left without a deal, but then when we were out on the court steps, they texted that they would agree to it being ED. So I finally got in writing that H is not allowed back in the house, I just had to pay him for it, but what I am paying is coming out of what his share of ED, so it's really just an advance on the buy out I am trying to make happen. And the rest of my motion I guess gets heard by the trial judge, and I won't be seeing that other horrible judge again.

So my new lawyer is making things happen for me. But I got a third bill from him today, and I have already incurred $11,000 of hours from him. That is not a typo. That is all my savings, gone.

We tried again to get them to take a universal buy-out and they refused. They refuse to acknowledge the marital debt, which is almost half the value of our house. They won't propose a number and they won't discuss the debt, so it will have to go to trial.

And I am starting to get really scared that I will end up having to go to trial just because H is too stupid to crunch the numbers. I did yet another spreadsheet that shows that he will make LESS if he sells the house at 20% above appraisal than accepting a buy out at appraised value because of the massive taxes.

I am having trouble accepting how much money he is forcing me to waste on lawyers. It is staggering how much money is going to lawyers instead of to my life and to my children, and all because H is delusional, not because I am fighting for more than my share or anything like that, just from sheer idiocy of MLC delusions.

So DnJ, what is your comforting thought about that for today?