Still Moving (Saying ILY Pt 7)

[mtb1981]

Congratulations on the new relationship! You are set up well for much success moving forward.

Just noticed your join date is June of 2013. Was the sitch two years ago your second sitch?

Yes, it was. I got a BD in Feb of 2013, then found this site a few months later. WW came back in Sep of 2013. I made the classic mistake of jumping right back in before she did any work. Just happy to have her back and thought things were going to be better. That, coupled with the fact that she was still addicted to and using pain killers was why I ended up here again. Looking back, I just wanted everything to work out so badly that overlooked a lot of warning signs. Over the next 4 years, her addiction just got worse. This just resulted in more lying, cheating, and stealing. I put up with a lot of crap because I thought I was doing what was best for my kids. I wanted so desperately to keep my family unit intact, that I put all of my needs to the side. It turns out, I wasn't doing anybody any favors. I just enabled her addict lifestyle, I was unhappy, and my kids had no consistency in their lives. It wasn't until I started DB'ing my @ss off, that things got better. I realized that her problems were hers and I could not fix her, so I let her go, hoping she would hit bottom and become the person I married again. I became the best father I could be, took on all parenting responsibilities, and provided the consistency and routine my kids needed. Along the way, the kids and I moved forward and she was left behind. I always hoped she would shake the addiction, come back to reality, and join us in that journey, but she never did. I finally reached the point where I knew I deserved better and that she was never going to change. Never in a million years did I think I would be divorced, but here I am. I actually used to joke around and tell everybody that I would never get married because you can't get divorced if you never get married...