Thanks for the comments. Had a long chat with W yesterday over message and she talked through a lot of marriage issues, and how terrible she feels about losing her way and how much she regrets the A. She said she hates herself for it and doesn’t know why she went through with it. She went over to OM’s tonight after the gym to formally break it off. I said I want her to have nothing further to do with him and never see him again. She has complied. Didn’t like her going to his tonight one bit but didn’t force the issue, she’s done that on her terms which I didn’t object to so that she could end it formally (although I was obviously suspicious). She maintains she went back to friends a while ago although I have no idea whether I believe that.
What should I be doing now? She is allowing herself to be tracked location-wise, is very sad and angry about the A, has broken off with OM (hopefully). I’ve read before on here you will “know when it’s time for her to come back”. What should I be looking for? Still cuts me up to think of the betrayal but really want to build a new foundation. It will still take me a while to forgive.