"Walking Out of the Valley" 3

[hoosjim]

Do you guys think I should discuss this with my youngest son (14)? I asked him last night how his day went. He proceeded to tell me that his mother drove him by some apartments and told him they may end up living in one of them. I just told him that she may move out and that I love him. Tried to encourage him to remain positive and understand that I will always be there for him.

That's good. Main thing is you still want him to feel "safe", loved, etc... Knowing you are there for him and available and that home, at least with you, will always be a "safe" place for him is very important. Only thing I would add is to reassure him that even though this is a difficult, confusing, and even scary time, that "none of this is his fault". Very common for kids to think it is something they have done and/or otherwise blame themselves. I and my sister went through this self-doubt and blame to a certain extent when our parents split even though we were 20 and 18.

If he pushes for details only then would I, perhaps, say "Mom met someone else (though it sounds like he may already know this from what you have posted previously) and has decided she doesn't want to be married to me anymore... she's looking for a new place to live. We may end up selling this house, but you will always have a place to live with me." No need to go into grim details of Mom's indiscretions.