Core, not only do I second everyone's suggestions about slowing down, I would go a step further and say to completely disregard her comment about reconciling. She needs to show you through ACTIONS, not words. And right now her actions are saying she is done with you and all about OM. I would give her time and space while you get out and GAL.
You ask what you can do about her cheating. Well, I understand you don't want to move out or pursue D, but you can still handle things like an in-house separation. Suggest to her that each of you take two evenings a week to GAL. Maybe she gets Monday and Wednesday and you get Tuesday and Thursday. I think I suggested this to you before but I don't think you ever implemented it. You take those two evenings and you go do something for yourself. Go have dinner with friends or whatever, but it is YOUR time and you do not tell her what you are doing with it. On her days she can go do what she wants. This will be a first step in her learning to miss you and realizing that you're not the Plan B she thinks you are.
