We carried everything together. Honestly at home he still carries his weight. 50/50 with out me asking. I mean I guess those are reasons why I still love him and why I think he deserves me to wait him out a bit. But why he still deserves me. I don't know. The person who left work, picked up my daughter and drove 4 hours to be by my side while my mother took her last breath deserves me. This person that I'm living with right now, the person that lies, and runs, and imploded our lives because he felt unfulfilled and won't even make a half hearted attempt at saving our marriage, I don't know that that guy deserves me at all.
My heart aches with you. I have similar feelings with my H also. I don’t believe my H is no longer that person he was in the past, but it is really like what others have said- it’s like the old H was abducted by aliens. Whether old H will return or not, I am prepared to know that he will probably different. I am different. Meanwhile it’s up to us whether we want to wait for the aliens to return our Hs back to earth.
