Questions from a LBS 5 months in

[Kindly]

Thank you so much both ownit and peacetoday! Your reassurance and words of advice are right in line with my thinking and my heart. This is so calming for me in such a place of misalignment.

How you navigate depends on what you want and whether you risk anything by not acting now (which I now assume the LBS does in most cases).
If you don't want to help with the divorce or move it along and not doing so doesn't hurt you, then just respond and say hey I noticed you left a bunch of stuff off. Why don't you send me a complete form and when I get it, I'll go see a lawyer and respond. If it is serious, he should fill it out and send it to you. If it isn't you won't hear anything.

The above is exactly what I want to do...but a conversation took place a couple months ago where he was dumbfounded and angry that I would even bring up his business as an asset!!! And then to completely leave that off of discovery yet mention my pension ?? What the heck! I feel like I’m in for a nasty battle of words if I try to address this “amicably”.

Don't assume that because it is not complete that a lawyer didn't do it. Could be a sloppy lawyer or an untruthful husband (my vote is on the untruthful husband). Or to save costs the lawyer could have given him the form and said fill this out and give it to her. Unless you want no communication with him and you want to pay lawyers to talk to lawyers (something that makes me chill to the bone, but some prefer this), then don't care whether he drafted it or the lawyer did because you will never know. As 25yearmlc always quoted, constant wondering is constant suffering.

I like to do things that leave the ball in his court so he can't accuse me of stalling (even though he still does) or think I'm trying to hold onto him (which makes him feel safe and happy to stay in his mess). It also tells me when he is really committed to doing something.

I agree and vote untruthful H as well however I asked again and he responded with yes it’s the lawyers final draft and nothing should change but then said he’s certain it will go back and forth between lawyers what the heck does that mean? Why would he say that unless he knows it’s not accurate...? Anyway, the only reason I’m giving this my time is because I too cringe at the thought of not sorting this first stage out by ourselves and the $$$ for L...but how do I even approach that with the reaction I got 2 months ago? I’m trying to predict what I’m in for as soon as I say “hey you left some major assets off”...just for some further insight he also told OW In EA that I will get vindictive and come after the B. Am I best to bite the bullet and involve the lawyers now? Or how can I do this effectively and with the ball still in his court which I’m also a huge fan of cause I too am not being accused of moving this along!!