This is a gift #2

[unchien]

A few questions for you:

Is she actively pursuing D or mediation?

Yes, mediation.

Or is it you who wants to start moving on?

I want to move on. I don't know what she wants.

What is it you want? Do you really want D?

I want more time with my kids, and I want to stop spending several K per month to sustain a limbo situation that is not going anywhere.

Does your W still want D?

No idea.

Do you know what she is thinking all the time?

Nope. I know what she is thinking NONE of the time.

Are you standing?

This is the question that has me pause and think alot.

I've really stepped away from identifying myself as "standing." What does that mean in my situation? If I continue in limbo, am I standing, or am I perpetuating a situation that leads nowhere? If I file for D, am I (counter-intuitively) standing for my MR, because I am standing up for myself and my basic needs (more time with the kids, better financial situation)?

If I had to reduce this to a simple answer, NO I am not standing anymore. Emotionally I have no desire to R today. But if I was standing, I think I would be making the same decisions anyways.

I guess I see it like this: AMOAFWL would work to get fair time with his kids and a fair financial situation.