One of the things my H will do is act like everything is fine and he's living a wonderful life while he does his best to avoid me when he's at home, which totally makes me question reality. Sometimes I will see a glimpse of anger or something other than that projection of happiness in him and remember that what's going on on the surface is very different than what's going on inside him, and that's why he's trying to run from it. It's crazy-making, which I suppose is a good reason for the compassionate detachment we're trying to reach.
Thx Cardinal - it’s so true...I am constantly questioning myself especially because he’s not showing the same behaviour to his closest friends. He is so matter of fact with them that they just take what he is saying at face value. I want to reach out to one of his co-workers so badly but I imagine that would be a no-no. He takes many opportunities to remind me that he’s serious ...”why would you buy that we won’t be here for long” or “when we sell”..... so hurtful....but his reality I guess. And the reminder to make changes for you is so important regardless of hard it seems at times.
Originally Posted by OwnIt
Mine is a professional with a very big and important job. His job loves him. He's gotten several promotions through this. He gets a lot of supply from the job so he has become a workaholic to soak up all the praise and adulation he gets there.
Ownit- this is one of the major catalyst in my situation. H is a workaholic and always has been. Once the MLC hit he dove into work even more. Praise and adulation became the only thing that mattered to him and I still didn’t see this shift as a problem until BD. Another area where it seems like he is still functioning highly which makes me question my sanity regarding whether this is MLC Or not .
