I'm sure you will miss what you have with OW. No garauntees that your feelings for your wife will return. That is a choice left to you. I can tell you that while you do have an OW your wife can't compete with it. That is a fact. I had to stand by and alow my x to find hapiness with another. I could not compete based on our history alone. Which at the time was all negative. Seeing it that way justified her need to divorce and find that hapiness. Is she happier now? Nope. It is just different but the same.
WC, you will be stuck in a vicious cycle if you think that special feelings define a relationship or a marriage. Needs change over time as you are now experiencing. People change. There was a time where I didn't think love was a choice but that it just happens. I love my x wife, after all she is the mother of my daughter. I would not like to see her harmed in any way. I care about her. I did have to choose to stop loving her though.
I'm over simplifying it but hopefully you get the idea. Sooner or later you are going to have to make a choice WC.
