Around this time 8 years ago my wife separated from me. At that time we had been married for 10years and I got the ILYBINILWY speech. We had three children then, I moved out of the house and was staying with family. I found this website and purchased the DB book and tried my best to the it. Months went by and after finally dropping the rope and GAL my wife began reaching out to me and we eventually reconciled.
Since then we had a fourth child and purchased a new home. On NYE I got the bomb dropped on me again but this time I knew it was coming and did nothing to stop it. For the past year we have been living as roommates, no fighting but no emotional connection either. She told me she wasn’t happy, that things were back to the way there were 8 years ago and all I did was make promises that I did not fulfill and did nothing to make myself a better person or husband.
I knew I wasn’t happy this last year and I told her many times that I wanted more in our relationship but I never put in the work myself. So I’m back to where I was 8 years ago, this time still in the house. I did ALL the mistakes again the first few days. Cried, begged, pleaded, etc. We told our kids we are separating and that W was gonna go stay at her parents for awhile. Right after that she spoke to her parents for the first time about the relationship and they convinced her to stay in the house. So I sleep on the couch and she has the bedroom. I’m struggling very bad, I can’t eat, I can’t sleep and I can’t believe I’m back here again. I’m trying to give her space in the house, being pleasant with her, not calling or texting her during the day but I can’t get the knot out of my stomach. I’ve done this the right way once before and here I sit failing again.
