AS is dead on, as usual. D does not mean no R. Common mistake that LBSs make. "But if he goes through with the D then that ruins our chances at R!' No it doesn't. D is often a step in the process. Many couples together today were married, got D'd, then later got back together and married again! It happens more than people think.
In fact, you can use the D process as a step towards R. How? By being as accommodating as possible. Most LBH's especially think "If I accommodate her then I will get screwed!" Once you make D about you vs. her, then it gets contentious. Then it gets to the point where there are deep wounds and bitter resentments.
Its like the movie When Harry Met Sally. Harry, watching his friends talk about moving in with each other, says "Helen (his exW) and I started like this. But then 10 years later you find yourselves fighting over this dish. This $5 dish will cost you $1000 talking to the law firm of That's Mine, This Is Hers!"
While humorous....it makes a good point. Bend over backwards to accommodate her. Do not die on a hill not worth dying on. Pick your battles, but then even fight those with kindness. Kill her with kindness in the D process. That will make a much better lasting impression than fighting her over every knickknack. Remember, it is all stuff. And just money.
Anyway, keep your chin up. It usually always gets worse before it gets better. Keep your eye on the ultimate goal and try to minimize doing things that will hurt your future chances.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
