Not much new to report, I don't think there will be in my situation, unless my wife decides to move forward with filing the divorce.
I just really miss her, I'm keeping busy, and everyone tells me how happy I seem, but it is hard going to bed in that empty bed.
I know we are supposed to not waste energy on hypothetical situations, but it's hard not to have some hope that I will get a chance to show her I still love and appreciate her.
js, this is not for you as much as it is for other LBSs that my read it. Because what you are going through is very common. There is an interesting dynamic that I have written extensively about here.......it is that the "grass is always greener".
Those that are IHS think that if their spouse would leave they would have it easier. That detaching is too hard seeing and interacting with their WAS so much.
Those that are physically separated struggle wondering how they'll ever show their WAS how many positive changes they are making.
It is a conundrum.
js, you admit that you are struggling with detachment. So flip this on its head and be thankful for the opportunity to be able to detach without her constant presence tripping you up. I listened to a podcast yesterday about the benefits of finding positives in whatever your situation is. So spend some time on that. Things like:
- I am so fortunate to have custody of the dogs - I am so fortunate to be in good health - It is a blessing that I can financially support myself
Etc.
Sit down every morning and think of 10 things to be thankful for. You'd be amazed at what that daily exercise can do for your mental and emotional well-being!
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
