This comment may get me a bit of backlash, but can I suggest you consider recording yourself..
When I lived with my WW I started to doubt myself from all the lies and gaslighting. I really did start to think I was going crazy at first. I started to go everywhere with an old iPhone in my pocket recording everything. My initial reason for this was to check when needed that I wasn’t going nuts.. After a while it served its purpose, I found this site and became familiar with the whole WW mentality..
But in the early days it really helped me... but I’ll never forget how WW would lose it and go into a rage... what added to her rage was the fact I always remained calm and composed... it drive her insane and she would scream at me “ why aren’t you shouting back” etc... Why was I always so calm... I knew I was recording myself and no matter how much she lost it ( got physical on one occassion) I was Mr Chilled... so in its own way it’s like having that person looking over your shoulder saying “don’t lose it”.... I was also concerned she was consider lying ( she lied about everything else) to get custody of the children etc.. I knew I always had to remain calm in case I needed these as evidence..
My Ww can never justifiably say I raised a voice to her... she has told people but I know it’s lies and can prove if I need to..Because that phone meant I was always calm...
Worth considering..
My question. Why record yourself? is it only for yourself and to make sure you are calm?
Because it seems like you have this idea that you can pull it out to prove to your W or other people that you were calm during interactions you recorded. Now let me ask you? imagine that scenario playing out. Your W says you blew your top, you pull out your phone and replay the interaction. How is your W going to react? Is she going to say, "Gee, you are right. I lied to my friends. Thanks for pointing this out."
Also, all this really proves to the WW is that you recorded the calm interactions.
Not to mention you should check the local laws because it may be illegal to record other people depending on the state.
