I know that the focus here is on the LBS and the WAS. But I was simply suggesting that not invalidating perceptions/feelings is a life skill that has benefits beyond DB. With any life skill, it does take practice and there is no better way to get practice than in a less stressful situation that an WAS and the LBS.
The LBS desperately wants to tell the WAS all the ways that their perception/feelings are wrong. Because, at least in most early days, the LBS thinks that will change things. I think MWD says something to that effect.
I do think Core's IC is not giving him the best advice about 1) telling his WAS that her perceptions are wrong and 2) initiating R talks at every chance.
I do hope you think no one was telling you how to post or what to say, that would be really frustrating.
