LH's example really hits home, I can think of a few such examples from my marriage as well and man do I wish I could get a redo on that. Instead of telling my XW how "wrong" her feelings were I would have listened, validated and supported her.
Yes, we've all made this mistake! Either in the marriage, or in our sitch, especially at the beginning. I know that in my sitch, for those two days were I hadn't remembered DBing at the beginning, I did quite a bit of this. You vets are right.....it did nothing but confirm to my W that I was the jerk H she thought I was, and that she was right to want out and to move on.
Core, listen to this advice. Perception is reality. Those resentments are her perception. Whether they are truly accurate or not doesn't matter because it is her reality.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
