Emotionally Unavailable

[ovrrnbw]

You are in LRT territory. LRT (Last Resort Technique) is simple, but hard:

1. Stop pursuing
2. GAL
3. Wait and see

You need to believe nothing she says and only half of what she does.

Detachment means what she says and does does not control you. Attitude, thoughts, actions, feelings. One after the other.

If she mentions having doubts about the divorce, just listen and validate. You really need to learn this. Spend several hours today learning about this. Prepare.

She still communicates with me on occasion, and even though she has said she wants a divorce, she hasn't gone through with any action towards a divorce. This has been hard for me, because when we do speak I just get the feeling she doesn't really want to commit to the divorce. Then it gets hard to follow the DB principles because I feel like I have to do something to save it. Which led to us having a conversation a few days ago.

Think and act, don't feel and react. Most people here drive their spouse away with the feel and react approach.

The best thing you can do to save it is.....NOTHING.

Now is a time of learning and growth for you. Don't peacock this to your W. She knows you, it will be obvious.

It could be over, it could be saved. We don't know yet. Focus on what you can control.