It's ok to feel down, man. I've been there too and you've helped pull me out of a lot of ruts.
Remember -
- You don't HAVE to do anything.
- There are always more than two options.
- These emotions you are feeling will pass.
- Thoughts are only thoughts, they are not reality.
Have you started reading E.T? That book came along at my lowest and it helped me claw my way out of a very negative cycle. I think you'll really like it too.