How do I Save this?

[WestM]

Thanks so much Steve85... did you W move out at all after that?

I stayed very clear about my financial boundaries last night and he went on to dividing the house and debt - we only got the mortgage in August 2019, with financial help from my dad, so there is zero equity and we have about 40K in debt. The only logical solution is for him to sign the house over to me and I look after the debt. If we sold now, we'd probably have to pay the bank due to our mortgage insurance etc. He agreed but was obviously unhappy.

This morning he was back on our three month trial of him living in the basement suite, but still dividing our expenses.

For someone who wants to eventually get divorced, he sure wants to hang on as much as possible. And besides when we talk about separating/divorce, we truly do get a long. We smile, have fun, joke and enjoy each other.

But you are right... he needs to get on with his "separate life". It is not what I want - and when I say that - he gets agitated. But I say it calmly and lovingly, this isn't what I want, but I support your desire to make this happen.