Cadet - I will continue to read the links I haven’t read yet.
OwnIt - I completely agree ... I set my goal very early on in this in that I wanted to manage this situation with as much kindness, understanding and truth as I could. So bluffing wouldn’t be a tactic for me...I’m just struggling with how to keep my feelings clear, allowing him to find his path without feeling like I’ve assisted him with the destruction of our marriage.
Before BD he suggested counselling to which we went to 3 sessions before I figured out that he was only going to tick a box to make his effort look good and only still intended on ending the relationship. In many of the readings I’ve seen people talk about their H confusion and how once they start to DB/D the H starts to come back around. I feel like there has been zero reconsideration of ending the relationship on his part. Is there more I can do? How did you figure out what terms needed agreeing to? Splitting of everything? He feels that because we don’t have kids this is super easy and let’s get on with it.
Last edited by job; 01/03/2009:39 PM. Reason: added spacing between paragraphs for easier reading.
