I have been employing the 180s fairly well, minimal contact (except for arrangements for the kids). I’ve been feeling stronger in myself and more resolved not to beg/plead/cry and chase. Every time before I go to see her, I read the 180s and Sandi’s 37 to pep me up and toughen my resolve to be kind but assertive.
W just drove past and decided to drop in with the kids and we talked about our R.
Very quickly it became a “you’ve done everything wrong, this is all your fault” type conversation.
And stupid me, I was reduced to a sobbing mess - promising that I loved her (she was asking why I’m so happy and if I have someone else) and that I’d do anything to make it work.
She left having got what she wanted - knowing that she still has me in her back pocket whenever she wants.
And now 30 mins later, I’m so disappointed in myself for having fallen into my old door mat pattern.
