One year in...

[Jac12]

My W has slid back to her old self. Blaming me for her money problems when I've been the one looking after our house and child and I have taken on more debt myself. She's moving out of her place in a month and has the option to move back home with her mom as she has a work from home job. She could save up some money and pay down her debt.

After 2-3 weeks of things looking positive, the last 2-3 weeks I feel have been a regression back to the way she was a few months ago: more distant with me and our son, picking fights, not in touch with reality, etc.

I'm trying hard not to get roped in but at the same time standing up for myself and how I've handled everything. For example when I mentioned that I have been patient and stood by her and helped her family out as needed (mostly her mom as she became a widow in March) she just said: "don't hold that against me forever, I didn't ask you to do any of that".

I just don't understand her fluctuating emotions - I hold onto the fact that she's depressed our dealing with another mental issue but maybe that's me looking for an answer? She won't see the psychiatrist and although she's starting counselling again in January the odds are that she won't stick with it based on the history.

I'm starting to understand why removing yourself from the situation and detaching is so critical - their emotions are all over the place. I wouldn't respond to my 2 year olds actions like this but hers trigger me for sure.

Anyways - it appears as though she has zero interest in me or our marriage despite her feeling better about things 4 weeks ago. Was it a bluff? Trying to rope me in? Trying to avoid paying for lawyers? Who knows, but I do know my time is better served working on myself and spending time with my son. Even if we were to R I dont' see that happening anytime in the near future.