So I'm realizing that she has drawn me back in...It's been 6 weeks since I got back from Florida and she seemed to be doing better and getting closer to her old self. She was hanging around the house a bit more and asking more questions about our son on the nights she wasn't with him.
The last two weeks I feel like she's regressed back to how she was a few months ago - distant. Now she's still being a bit more open but she hasn't offered to spend anytime with me except for the invite to her family's Christmas dinner. This Christmas was also the first Christmas without her father so I'm sure that's been weighing on her too.
For New Years, I offered her to join me and another couple (we always saw them at New Years) and she doesn't seem interested and although she doesn't yet have concrete plans it seems she'd rather see what her friends end up doing than spend it with me. The crappy thing is a few weeks ago she seemed to come to the realization that love is a choice and after you've been with someone for a long time you enter a different phase in the relationship. So she says she understands that but still doesn't seem to be choosing me (except for things I can help her with or she knows I'm good at).
So now I feel like I've been roped back in and now she's getting distant again.
So...I was doing well and now I've regressed. The Pursuit-Distance Dynamic is likely rearing it's head so I really need to be better at focusing on myself and my son and GAL whenever I can. I've fallen into a rut I can tell.
I would appreciate any advice...I feel lost at the moment with how to proceed - I guess I just need to get back to doing what I was doing in September and October before I went away on the trip. I was prepared to meet with our L's and figure out the separation agreement. I wasn't contacting her at all (and I still don't but in her presence I'm starting more conversations - not about us though). I was mentally preparing myself to be a single dad and for the last 6 weeks I've though that maybe our family would be back together and that EXPECTATION has created some negative emotions in me now.
2x4's welcome.
H 37 W 31 S 2
T: 7 M: 4
BD 12/18 Separated 2/19 Living back together 04/06/2019 W Moved out again 07/15/2019