Also, wrt your sons... Do NOT feel guilty. Your son's are old enough to understand what is going on, and You do not owe her any protective lies or cover stories. While you obviously shouldn't be actively trashing her or trying to poison her relationship with them, you also shouldn't be going out of your way to hide the truth from them or cover for her... If they ask you something the truth is never the wrong answer. At the end of the day she is a big girl and chose this course of action... And actions have consequences. One of the natural consequences of this sort of behavior is the damaging ofone's relationships with one's children, and you certainly do not owe her any protection in that regard.

And should she ever object to the kids knowing the truth, your response should simply be "What, you want me to lie to our children?"

To which her response might be "why wouldn't you just want everyone to be happy"

To which, in turn, your response would be "so you expect them to be happy that their family is being broken up?"

Last edited by hoosjim; 12/28/19 05:01 AM.
H53/W51, R-ing 4/'18

"Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires"-Sg.of Sg 2:7

"So oftentimes it happens,that we live our lives in chains, & we never even know we have the key"-Eagles III 1:3