Hi, Hope. I just wanted to say I caught up on your threads and I just empathize with everything you're going through. I read through to the present of your sitch and came away feeling so hopeful for you and also wondering how I can ever be as strong as you have been. Though we don't have children, I recognize some of my own situation with my H, who I expect will file for D in January. We've been living together since BD in June, and if you visit my thread, you'll see I think he's maybe going through MLC or some version of that and has some nice guy tendencies, but who knows, really. I live near you, and I am currently feeling overwhelmed with what navigating D process will mean for me, if/how I need to respond legally (I assume I will respond and then we will work out an agreement), and how to handle interactions with him after the papers are filed, all as I look for a job. I also struggle with detachment and a 180 on my H feeling unloved/unappreciated. It made me feel less alone to see you had this question too:
Originally Posted by HopeCA
That’s what I’m wondering, if I should still be saying those kinds of things at this point, considering D has been filed and I have made it all too clear that it’s not a mutual decision, haha. So perhaps at this stage it might be better for my response to be more pulled back and have more of the “I’m fine with this at this point” vibe....?
It seemed like that's pretty much what you did—made it clear that it was not what you wanted in the beginning and then responded to the papers and only cooperated to move the process forward whenever he initiated next steps. I am curious as to where exactly you are in that process—I know you had the court appearance in November, so, if I understand things correctly, you'd still have to work out a formal agreement with H before the D would be finalized?
Please forgive me if I'm hijacking your thread! As I read more of your history, I feel like I'm getting a glimpse into what the next 6 or so months could be like for me and how difficult and confusing it's really going to be.
