I was in this Exact same position as you are 12 months ago..
One thing i will say ( which is probably not much use to you now ) is that it gets so much better.
Sandy says they stay wayward until they hit rock bottom.. ie they are stuck in the affair fog...
On the other hand there is the LBS fog.. But there will come a point when this lifts and you will see things so much clearer.
Focus on the stuff you can control.. Focus on you.. Focus on Respect.
You are doing a great job.. Keep it up and get her out. Read Curtis's thread. That is where you dont want to be in 3 months. You can't make people respect you.. Respect is earned by actions.. Keep taking action and earn peoples respect. Get to the point where you don't care if the WW respects you or not - her loss - Just like she lost her self respect and dignity when she cheated.
The best post i have read on here ( ok i was slightly drunk ) was the Top Gun post last night.. A great post... Become that guy...
Re the remorse. I think it depends on the person - At the minute.. Not a hope in hell of remorse. Maybe for 5 minutes as thats whats in her head at that time. As long as she is WW her feelings are up and down, so it will never be sincere.
In the case of my WW, she became phyical with EA3 last January. She moved out in March and they became an item. I went dark and she was just a nasty piece of work.
They didnt last - I suspected they has split even before my children told me. Her actions changed... She keeps ringing me ( i refuse to speak to her - everything is in writing ) , she continually texts me and its always polite / nice and she keeps trying to talk to me on child exchanges.
I even got an Xmas present tonight !!!! (i got her nothing )
She has never appologised, but i'm convinced she is a narsasist, so will never admit to wrongs, but her actions have chnaged.
Its irrelivant to me as ive moved on.
The chances of OM and WW making it work long term are less that 2%.. You have more chance of winning the lottery. So one day she may show remorse, but do you really want to be plan B.. Life is short.. Live it - You will get past the point of caring about remorse etc.. Just live for you and enjoy Xmas.
Just thing concequences to actions.. I sit her smiling, knowing my children chose to wake up at my house on Xmas morning, and are spending the day with me - their choice. You children know the truth so just be there for them and look after yourself - Happy Xmas.
Thanks Mr. B for the kind words. I know that my kids are the most important thing in my life and they will see that there mother has decided to peruse other things in life. I know I need to move on and be strong for them. After this last incident it has woken me up to the reality of what she is doing to me. Anybody no matter what they have ever done in their past does not deserve to be treated this way.
I have read Curtis’s thread and it scares the hell out of me. I do not want to be in his position and I feel so sorry for what he has gone through. If I continue in this cycle then that could easily be me next year.
