It sounds to me like your father is either trying to control the situation over the money. It's not his money to hold hostage. If your grandmother wanted you to have this money, then he should give it to you...after all, you are a grown woman and will do what is best for you and your child.
Your father sounds like he is a bit lost in the world and doesn't know how to deal w/the real world. He sounds like he may have had a MLC at some point because he still sulks if you aren't all into those hugs, etc.
Keep your expectations very low w/him because I do think he has no clue how to communicate w/you because you are not that little girl of yesteryear...but a strong, independent woman who knows her mind.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
