Actually I am not getting much of that from W. Lately W has been a bit more pleasant but I don't know what that means. Sharing some details about the kids over text, things like that. It is a bit of a cognitive distortion when she is nice to me, as she has also called me abusive and violent within the last 2 months.
U - in my opinion, at least part of what your W is going through is MLC related. It is very similar to part of what my W is going through. All depression-like symptoms - illogical thinking, no (known) OP (although it's best to assume so), withdrawing, looking for the fantasy world, looking for someone to blame for everything etc...
Nothing makes sense in this world. And you did not break her. I know we all assume responsibility for our own part of the MR failures as we should, but this is something she is going through, not you. The more you come to understand this, the better prepared you will be for the rollercoaster, regardless of outcome.
Originally Posted by unchien
Reality:
I need to resolve the financial and custody issues in my situation. But I spend a lot of time problem-solving in my head. Taking a problem-solving approach is not helping. It worsens my anxiety.
I do not need to resolve my MR. If, for instance, we were sharing 50-50 custody, and I was effectively paying an appropriate support payment to my W, I could continue on without feeling pressure....
This is how my mind works... I can never make a decision. Sigh... need to go back and revisit my NGS methinks.
As I've recommended to you before, if you're stuck in a loop, the best way to start making decisions is...to make a decision.
Figure out one small thing that you can do, on your own, for yourself.
I don't know what that could be from reading words on a screen here, U - but i think if you do that you will feel a little better about yourself and stop some of the spinning.
